Every birthday is a reason to celebrate. Friends, family, cake, decorations – it’s all a fun part of growing up. But there are some birthdays that are milestones, making them a special time to party. From cake smashes to religious ceremonies, this article provides tips and inspiration to make these special occasions truly magical for your loved ones.
First Birthday
This is a birthday full of traditions. Many parents choose to celebrate with two cakes, one for party guests, and one for the birthday child to smash. The 1-year-old puts their face in it, grabs handfuls of cake and frosting, and makes a mess. The goal is to produce some delightfully cute photos and let the baby enjoy the feel, taste, and fun of slathering themselves with cake. Some parents create a time capsule with meaningful items and things that represent that year. That capsule can then be opened on the child’s 18th birthday to see how things have changed. First birthdays often are family oriented.
“We had a gathering at the house, and we had a little blow up pool,” said Whitney Hierro, who recently celebrated her son Wyatt’s first birthday. “We did pictures before his birthday with his smash cake.”
Hierro got a plain vanilla cake with vanilla frosting for the smash cake. “He smashed into it and absolutely hated it, which I heard is very normal because it is very sweet.”
13th Birthday
For children of the Jewish faith 13 is the big milestone birthday. That is when boys have their bar mitzvahs and girls have their bat mitzvahs (the general plural term is b’nai mitzvah). The religious ceremony highlights the child’s readiness to observe religious precepts and be eligible to take part in public worship. The ceremony has many traditional rituals, including the reading of the Torah and giving a speech. This coming-of-age ritual in Judaism showcases the belief that the child is now able to be held accountable for their own actions, know Jewish ritual law, tradition, and ethics, and are able to participate in all areas of Jewish community life. The ceremony is a way to celebrate and impress upon the teenager the significance of this milestone. Traditionally the ceremony is held in a synagogue, though some opt to hold it in a private venue. After the ceremony, there usually is a celebration or reception with music, dancing, and food. The reception parties widely vary in their scale and expense, from a simple luncheon or modest buffet to elaborate multi-course events and entertainment.
Oliver Schwartz, 13, recently celebrated his bar mitzvah at Temple Shalom in Naples. It was the culmination years of preparation, beginning in the third grade when he started to learn Hebrew. Oliver led the service and the prayers, read in Hebrew from the Torah, and gave a speech. The ceremony was followed by a luncheon reception at the temple. That evening they celebrated with a large party at Tiburon Golf Club.
Oliver said he wasn’t nervous since he had lots of practice and is the third of the four children in his family to experience this milestone. “I was always waiting for it,” he said. “I was always going to ones for other relatives and for my siblings, and I always wanted to have one.”
While the party is fun, his mother, Melanie, said that is not the highlight of the day.
“The most important part is the service,” she stressed. “A lot of families focus on the party and just use the service as an excuse for it. We loved doing the party and the dinner dance, but the service for us is very meaningful. It is a big milestone, and it is rewarding.”
While the service means Oliver is considered an adult in the community, he laughs as he says it doesn’t mean he can drink or drive or do other adult things.
“It’s an adult Jewish journey,” Oliver explained.
His journey that special day ended with the party that featured dancing, professional dancers to entertain the kids, a dessert station, lots of glow favors, and a big dinner followed by s’mores on the terrace.
A highlight of the party for Oliver was being hoisted in the air while guests surrounded him dancing a traditional dance called the Hora (see photo on page 24). “I liked going up in the chair because it was like flying,” he said.
Quinceañera
Children in the Spanish culture have to wait until they are 15 for their coming-of-age celebration. The quinceañera originated in Mexico, but is now celebrated around the world. Back in the day of the Aztecs, when a girl turned 15 she would be considered to be ready for marriage, and so the celebration was an event for a young girl turning into a women. The quinceañera is both a religious and social event that emphasizes the importance of family and society in the life of a young woman. It typically starts with a religious ceremony with blessings and a reading of a chosen passage by the birthday girl. Then it’s on to a celebration that features food, music, and dancing. The birthday girl is accompanied by her “court” of damas (girls) and chambelánes (boys).
Some of the traditions include group dances with the court, a father-daughter dance, the presentation of a doll to a younger sister to show that the birthday girl is giving up her childhood, and the placement of heeled shoes on her feet, to indicate that she is ready for womanhood.
Maria Deleon-Jose celebrated her quinceañera last year and skipped the religious ceremony, going right to the party. She said it took months of planning to get the right dress, food, and activities.
“It was very fun,” Maria said. “I wore a big pink dress. In the Mexican tradition quinceañera is girls becoming young ladies.”
The quinceañera can be as big and elaborate as a wedding. Local parents on Facebook recently wrote about the huge cost of this special event.
“Between 10 to 15k so you can offer a nice trip and a photo shoot with a rented dress,” wrote Laura Ramirez. “You could do it for way less, but it’s a once-in-a-lifetime chance, so most choose the party.”
“My sister just did one for about 40k … in Miami,” added Sulye Cruz.
“I spent $30,000 on my twins’ quinceañera,” wrote Laura Yanely Andrade.
“I am planning my daughter’s 15th and the band she wants is $8,000 for just four hours. I am thinking of getting a second job,” wrote Ruiz Nallely.
Sweet 16
Many years ago a 16-year-old would have a debutante party. This originated in the Victorian era and was the time when a teenager was presented to society in the hopes of finding a suitable mate. In older traditions, a birthday girl would sit in a chair while her father, grandfather, godfather, uncle, or brother removed her flat shoes or slippers and brought her high heels. Over time, this tradition has evolved into a Sweet 16 party. Now the coming of age party is more a time for fun and friends.
Gisselle Crespo, owner of Memorable Mobile Parties, created a Sweet 16 event featuring a candy bar. Another client requested T-shirts and hats that the birthday girl and her friend air brushed. While big parties are popular, local teens have also found other creative ways to celebrate this milestone birthday.
Kari Domain rented a Mercedes Sprinter van and driver for her daughter Ella and 12 of Ella’s friends.
“They listened to music in the van, and it took them to Tacos and Tequilas for dinner, and then they danced in the van,” Domain described. “Then it took them all the way to Fifth Avenue for ice cream.”
The van also made a loop through Mercato during the four-hour party.
“All the girls told me it was the best party they ever had,” said Domain.
Ella agreed.
“The music was really fun and the lights were really great. There was sparkling cider and that was fun,” she said.
Kylie Eaton doesn’t want a party for her Sweet 16 this July, so her mom is taking Kylie and her sister and Kylie’s friend on a cruise. Kylie also chose a special add on adventure to snorkel around a sunken ship during the cruise. Her mom, Cassy Eaton, said 16 is a milestone birthday and marks a time when teenagers become more independent, so she wanted to do something special.