MOMentum Moms: Yuderca Barbera

Meet our first MOMentum Mom, Yudy Barbera. In addition to running her own business with her husband (Business Plus Tax Solutions), Yudy is the chairwoman of the Collier County Democratic Party, the treasurer of the Collier County NAACP, mother of five (almost six!) children, and grandmother of four.

Born in 1965 in Santa Domingo, Naples mom Yuderca “Yudy” Barbera lived in the Dominican Republic for four years before spending the rest of her youth in San Juan, Puerto Rico. After moving to New York City with her family at the age of 15, Yudy became both a single mom and a US citizen at the age of 21. With a small child to care for, she graduated with an Associates Degree in Art and later a Bachelor’s Degree in Ac-counting from Lehman College of the City University of New York.On a vacation to Miami, Yudy fell in love with Florida. She sold most of her be-longings, found a job, and moved to Hialeah, where she later met the love of her life, Angel Barbera, in 1993. They married and blended their families (his two daughters and her son) and eventually moved to Naples in 2002.While the three older children (Ken-neth, Darlene, and Michelle) are now adults and have children of their own, 18-year-old Katarina is at Florida International Univer-sity and 14-year-old Natalie is a freshman at Palmetto Ridge High School. The Barbera family is in the process of adopting 11-year-old Chary from the Dominican Republic. While Chary is Yudy’s niece, the adoption is still being conducted as an international adoption with the exhaustive processes, interviews, and evaluations that all international adoptions require. Because her only parent can no longer care for her, the Barbera family hopes to bring Chary “home” very soon, so she can begin school and adapt to American life.

How do you balance being a mom and wife with your professional and volunteer obligations? I can do it with the help of my family. I can work and participate in the different volunteer organizations because I don’t watch TV. Not everything I do is 100%, but I have never missed one of my children’s events. You have to know what is important, and focus on quality time together.

What is a typical week night like for your family?  I usually get home at 7, 8, or 9 depending if I am attending a meeting.  I sit and talk to my daughter about her day. Usually my husband or my daughter cooks. I usually cook on the weekends.

What does your family like to do for fun? We like to watch movies, BBQ, go on short trips.

Typical date night for you and your husband? My husband and I work together, so we see each other all during the day. At home we usually talk about the kids and what they need in school. We also talk about what is happening in the country or local news. 

Favorite restaurant to go to as a family? We love to go to Pinchers. I love seafood. We also like Perkins when we are in the mood for breakfast. We can eat breakfast at any time of the day!

Best parenting advice you ever re-ceived and from whom? My mother was always an inspiration.  The best advice is that as long as children know that they are loved and wanted, they will do better in life.  Also, as parents we have to let them know that making mistakes is okay because that is what will make you a mature adult and will give you the strength to handle many difficult situations.

Proudest moment?  I have many:  Each time I became a mother. Each time I see my kids doing the right thing.  Each time I fall but I manage to get up and rebuild my life.  Every time I look at my mother and the feel how lucky I am to have her as a mother. The fact that I found my faith on my own. Being able to finish college and have my degree against all odds. The day I married my husband.

Biggest regret? Not being able to do more for my family. 

Do you feel a conflict between want-ing to help our community after Irma and helping Puerto Rico after Maria? It is difficult to see what is happening in Puerto Rico, especially because I lived my childhood there.  I know how caring and hard working Puerto Rican people are. The important thing as Americans is to be neighbors helping neighbors. There are enough resources to go around; we can rebuild both.

What is the best part about living in Naples/Golden Gate Estates? I love the town. I love the community. I have met so many wonderful people here. I love the school system and how music and art are an important part of the curriculum here.

Best advice for parents going through the adoption process?  You really have to sit down and talk it over with everyone in the family. You also have to prepare for the fi-nancial burden because the process is costly.

What is the hardest part about the adoption process? The hardest part is the wait. A child is in danger but you still have to go through a rigorous amount of paper-work and the child keeps suffering. Also, the more time passes, the bigger the child gets, and then it will be harder for the child to adjust. The Dominican Republic and the U.S. have an agreement call the Hague Convention, where the countries agree that a inter-country adoption will only happen in the best interest of the child.  These coun-tries will always look for a family in their country to adopt the child before allowing a different country to do it.  The law doesn’t differentiate between a family member or an unknown parent.

What will Thanksgiving be like with your family this year? Every year, everyone comes to our house. My daughter Katarina and I prepare the turkey and the sweet po-tatoes dessert. My son prepares the mashed potatoes and all the pies from scratch. His wife, Linda, prepares collard greens and corn bread. My daughter Natalie prepares all of the green salads and gets the tables set up ready. We prepare all American recipes. No Hispanic food allowed!

Photography by Lisette Morales