Chip Riegel
When you consider the idea of boarding school, what comes to mind?
Perhaps stuffy, old world, antiquated, academic traditions? And yet, there are approximately 300 boarding schools in the United States and Canada where students participate in rigorous edu-cational pursuits, receive focused attention from experienced faculty and staff, and pre-pare for the challenges of undergraduate institutions. Maybe boarding school is not on your radar, but did you know a number of Southwest Florida families choose to send their children to boarding schools?
Rectory School, an independent junior boarding and day school in Pomfret, Conn., draws students for all over the country, including Collier County. This preparatory institution maintains a high level of academic excellence as well as a tight-knit community, according to Dawn Chmura, director of communications and dorm parent. “This is my 18th year at Rec-tory. I have never experienced a community quite like Rectory; as soon as you are a part of this community, whether as a child or an adult, you are immediately embraced into the family. Students become our children; we hope with them, we dream with them, and we seek to make them feel empowered, safe, and happy,” Chmura said.
Parents send their children to board-ing school for a host of reasons, according to Chmura. “Often, their children need something that isn’t available to them in their own backyard. It’s a hard decision for parents to make and when you think about sending a middle school-aged child away to a junior boarding school (Rectory goes through 9th grade), it’s even more difficult. In some cases, it’s because their child needs additional support because of a learning difference,” she said.
Chmura cited the unique community available to students at boarding schools. “Boarding schools draw students from all around the world. Our students gain a global perspective that they wouldn’t nec-essarily have in their hometown schools. Additionally, students at boarding schools have access to amazing arts and athletics programs, state-of-the-art facilities, and teachers who understand each child on different levels because they are also their coaches and dorm parents.”
Chmura also noted that the boarding school setting helps students gain confidence in themselves and their abilities. “I’ve seen students who may have struggled to read in the past become avid readers and gain so much confidence because of the focused, individualized attention. Our days are very structured. Students follow a routine that helps them accomplish everything they need to do throughout the day. This routine helps them build strong habits and set a firm foun-dation for their educational career and life.”
Local families
Dr. Theresa Vensel of Naples sends her daughter to Phillips Academy in Andover, Mass. “The decision was driven by my daughter. My husband attended boarding school, and she grew up hearing stories about his experiences. Intrigued by the academics, environment, community, and opportunities, she started explor-ing various boarding schools by attending boarding school presentations in Boca Raton and researching schools online. In the fall of her 8th grade year, I traveled with her to visit and interview at six schools. Each school had a distinct feel, and Phillips Academy fit her best. She loved the mix of intense academics, diverse community, and the focus on kindness.”
Vensel noted that her relationship with her daughter hasn’t suffered as a result of her living far from home. “We have always been very close; she calls frequently, even if for a few minutes as she is walking to the dining hall.” And, Vensel has seen her daughter’s confidence grow in leaps and bounds. “She has always been independent and great at multitasking. At Phillips, though, her time management skills have adjusted to encompass all aspects of her life. Her confidence has grown significantly. Each new adventure has given her the op-portunity to realize how capable she is.”
The Vensel family encourages other parents to seek out boarding school – if the process is driven by the child. “Being at boarding school is challenging in so many different ways. The individual who is driven enough to think outside the traditional local school path and want to go the board-ing school route has a foundation to face academic, social, and environmental chal-lenges. I was always a mom who encour-aged academic independence beginning in early elementary school. If you are a parent who likes to be in daily communication with teachers regarding homework or tests or other such class details, I think it would be challenging.”
Shannon and Jon Pertchik’s children, Harper and Cooper, attend different boarding schools. Harper is a junior at The Hotchkiss School in Lakeville, Conn., and Cooper is a freshman at Deerfield Academy in Deerfield, Mass. Like the Vensel family, the Pertchiks’ venture into the boarding school world was prompted by their daughter. One summer, Harper played on an international volleyball club that competed in Europe. One of her teammates talked at length about this thing called ‘boarding school.’
“For an entire year, Harper asked about attending such a place, and for one year we said no,” said Shannon Pertchik. But Harper’s persistence paid off. “After visiting several, our eyes and minds were opened to the incredible op-portunities these places provided. Our son was hooked once he saw what our daughter was experiencing.”
“Boarding school is certainly not for every child,” Pertchik cautioned. “For children who are independent, ambitious, willing to take a risk, and have at least a small sense of adventure, boarding school may be the right choice. For us, giving up the kids four years prematurely was extremely difficult. When we experienced these schools, though, we saw communities of ambitious, strong students in environments with massive resources, and faculty, coaches and ad-ministrators who have chosen to assume a 24-7 life committed to students.”
The Naples-based family’s lives are different than the norm because of boarding school. “Of course, logistically and practically we do not see our children every day,” Pertchik said, “nor do we taxi them around and have that time together riding in the car. However, in the broader picture, our relationships are just as strong, and perhaps in some ways stronger as a result of the dis-tance. They still count on us for support and help. We spend a great deal of time vis-iting them, and we get to watch their sports live streamed. We miss them, and we think they miss us, but we are very confident the choices and sacrifices we have made as a family will help them grow into more successful and fulfilled adults.”
For Dana Zeitler of Naples, her years as a boarding school student at Foxcroft School in Middleburg, Va., taught her independence and also strengthened her relationship with her parents.
“I enjoyed the experience, and I be-came more independent. I learned to balance a checkbook and do my own laundry. I gained a greater understanding of others’ nationalities and religions. Attending Foxcroft made me more of a free thinker, and I learned to look at issue from different perspectives. I had roommates from China, Switzerland, Kuwait, and friends from all over the world.”
Zeitler credits boarding school with creating a healthier relationship with her parents. “I was not at home to rebel against my parents’ rules (my dad was pretty strict). So, I didn’t resent them during my high school years, and I appreciated them more. We only spoke once a week (there were no cell phones in the 80s). I missed them, but I was living with my friends, playing soccer and tennis, and riding horses.”
Zeitler echoes the Vensels’ and Pertchiks’ perspective on the boarding school decision: “I’d recommend this type of ex-perience if the student really wants to go. I was involved in picking my school, and I was excited to be there. It was like summer camp that lasted all year long for me!”