For many families, school anxiety in Collier and Lee Counties is no longer a rare crisis. A kindergartener is having severe anxiety after starting school this year. A first grader is having panic attacks. A middle school student is begging her parents to homeschool her because the stress is too much, and high school students, overloaded with schoolwork and social pressures, are heading to psychologists to learn coping methods. If your child lives in Southwest Florida and school feels like too much, you are not alone.
Anxiety is now the most common mental health disorder in children and teens nationwide. Since COVID-19, local counselors report a sharp spike in SWFL students who feel overwhelmed by schoolwork, social media, and nonstop pressure. The good news: there are clear signs to watch for, and real help available here in Collier and Lee Counties.
Why are so many SWFL students feeling anxious about school?
Local therapists say there isn’t one cause. It’s a mix of pandemic disruption, academic expectations, lifestyle changes, and constant digital noise.
“The basic one is Covid, and even after five years, we are still seeing a lot of issues with social anxiety,” said Meagan Weems, lead child therapist at the David Lawrence Centers in Naples.
Many young children spent crucial developmental years without playgrounds, playdates, or in-person kindergarten. Instead, they learned to relate through screens. That gap shows up now as trouble joining groups, making friends, or speaking up in class.
Social media also fills a bigger space in kids’ lives than ever before. During the pandemic it was a lifeline, but it came with a cost.
“We do see the benefits,” Weems said. “Kids love social media, but it opens up a different avenue for bullying. We have been seeing social media becoming more and more of a problem.”
Naples counselor Jennifer O’Toole sees the same pattern.
“There are studies that show that being outside in nature reduces anxiety,” O’Toole said. “When you are constantly on screens and social media, you are getting messages that you are not enough, and there is always someone who is richer and thinner and prettier. That creates a lot of anxiety.”
How has school changed since we were kids?
Another major trigger for anxiety in SWFL students is school itself. The expectations look very different from what many parents remember.
Kindergarteners now have academic days with one short recess and no play kitchens or toy corners. Second graders may be reading complex texts and multiplying numbers. High school students cram in AP classes, dual enrollment, sports, and clubs so they look “good enough” for college.
“There is always academic pressure on kids and now the teenagers are in a very competitive stage that brings a lot of anxiety because they want to be the best,” Weems explained.
She recalled a teen who had eight hours of homework for her AP and honors classes. “There was no wind-down time,” Weems said. “She said, ‘I work until I sleep.’”
Patty DeVost, a licensed clinical social worker and founder of Patty’s Place Concierge youth mental health care in Cape Coral, notices the same pressure in boys and teens she sees.
“A lot of kids suffer from anxiety from having too much on their plates,” she said. “I used to play outside until dinner time. You could just be a kid. Those days are gone. These kids are freaking out.”
One student she worked with described what many local children feel every day.
“Just yesterday, I noticed a student taking deep breaths while he was talking — almost like a nervous tic,” DeVost said. “When I asked if he felt nervous, he told me, ‘I feel rushed. I feel rushed in the morning, and I feel rushed to finish my work at school.’ A child shouldn’t feel that way.”
Which kids are carrying invisible stress?
Some children in our community are carrying more than homework and tests.
DeVost sees particularly high anxiety in children of immigrants. Some take on adult responsibilities, like grocery shopping, because their parents are afraid to be seen in public.
“They have talked about contingency plans; about where to go and who will take care of them if their parents are no longer there,” she said. “The families are on lockdown; they are not going out. They are hyper scared. There are a bunch of children in Collier County in that situation.”
Dr. Jason Saba, a licensed psychologist with Kids’ Minds Matter, hears similar stories from children in Lehigh Acres and across Lee County.
“My providers in the Lehigh office have seen that,” Saba said. “We want to get the word out that we don’t have to take any identifying information. We are going to help anyone who walks in the door.”
What does anxiety look like at different ages?
Anxiety has always been part of childhood, but the intensity and number of children affected have changed.
In toddler and preschool years, separation anxiety between 18 months and 3 years is a normal stage. Young kids might fear monsters or bad guys and need extra reassurance at bedtime.
As children grow, worries shift. Elementary and middle schoolers may lie awake worrying about grades, a hurricane, or whether their parents might divorce. Teens may worry about school shooters, social status, or college admissions. Lockdown drills can reinforce those fears, even when schools are trying to keep kids safe.
Signs of school anxiety can include:
- Frequent stomachaches or headaches before school
- Trouble sleeping or early morning waking on school days
- Crying, meltdowns, or refusal to get dressed or out of the car
- Clinginess, panic, or “what if” questions about safety
- Perfectionism, erasing work repeatedly, or fear of making mistakes
- Sudden drop in grades, missing assignments, or school avoidance
The New York Times reports that nearly one-third of adolescents have been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder at some point, pointing to screen time, reduced play, and increased academic demands as key drivers. Those national trends show up clearly in Collier and Lee County classrooms.
How do screens, social media, and gaming add to anxiety?
Parents often suspect that phones and games are part of the problem, and local experts agree.
O’Toole notes that when kids scroll constantly, they absorb a steady stream of “not enough” messages about their bodies, clothes, and lives. That can make even confident kids feel on edge.
Weems also sees more fear-based anxiety linked to unsupervised internet use.
“I am seeing a lot of unsupervised internet access,” she said. “For example, Poppy Playtime and Five Nights at Freddy’s – the titles and style are catered toward children, but they are actually horror games. There is fear-based anxiety from that.”
Social media and gaming can also crowd out sleep, exercise, and face-to-face time with friends. Those are the very things that protect kids’ mental health.
When should we consider counseling for school anxiety?
If school anxiety in Collier and Lee Counties is stopping your child from learning, sleeping, or enjoying activities they once loved, it may be time to call in extra support.
Weems uses cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) with many of her young clients at David Lawrence Centers.
“A lot of my clients missed out on crucial developmental times socially because they were not surrounded by their peers,” she explained. “So, we play Jenga or a card game to help with their socialization skills.”
She tailors each plan to the child.
“Everyone is different. There are so many different avenues,” she said. “Some of these kids are exposed to traumatic events.”
Kids’ Minds Matter, an initiative of Lee Health and Golisano Children’s Hospital, helps families find care, even when cost is a barrier. Founded in 2016, the program funds services and sends mental health experts into local schools to provide free counseling. They currently have five offices in Lee County and are opening one in Collier County.
“We look for the gaps in services in the community,” Saba said. “We don’t turn anybody away for lack of money. If they don’t have insurance, we find a way to take care of it, and we have the means to do it.”
There is one big challenge: access.
“We have a waitlist of over 300. We are helping kids as quickly as we can, but access is a big problem,” Saba said, noting that waits can range from a few months to a year.
What can parents in Collier and Lee Counties do right now?
While you wait for an appointment, or even before anxiety spirals, parents can make a powerful difference at home.
Saba stresses prevention and early action.
“Being present with kids is essential,” he said. “When parents are present, they hear what their children are thinking and feeling. Those conversations help give kids the tools they need to cope.”
Practical steps you can take include:
- Slow the schedule. Look at your child’s week and remove at least one activity if they seem constantly rushed or exhausted.
- Build in calm time. Protect a short daily block for free play, reading, or quiet time with no screens.
- Limit social media and scary content. Keep devices out of bedrooms at night and review games or videos with your child.
- Get outside together. Walk, bike, or play at a park. Time in nature can lower anxiety for both kids and adults.
- Partner with school. Reach out to your child’s teacher or school counselor if mornings are a battle or grades suddenly change.
- Talk about feelings early and often. Name anxiety when you see it and let your child know it’s okay to ask for help.
For low-pressure family time that can help everyone reset, explore local parks, beaches, and community events. Neapolitan Family’s Collier and Lee County calendar lists kid-friendly activities that can give your child a break from school stress while keeping them connected in healthy ways.
If school feels like too much for your child, you are not failing, and neither are they. School anxiety in Collier and Lee Counties is a community-wide issue with real causes. With your steady presence, support from local providers, and small daily changes, your child can learn to cope, grow, and feel safe at school again.